Sunday 3 January 2010

And The Hits Just Keep On Coming...

More than 150 jobs will be created in Lewisham after the Council secured almost £1m funding from the government’s future jobs fund scheme.
The government doesn't have any money, Newsshopper journalist, we do.

We, the taxpayer, are shelling out for this thinly-disguised attempt to massage the unemployment figures and do a little bit of empire-building on the side:
Forty-nine jobs will be with Lewisham Council and the rest in partner organisations including Age Concern, Lewisham College, Phoenix Community Housing and The Albany theatre, Deptford.
Ah. Don't know about the Albany Theatre, but the others are more local council public sector workers and their partners-in-crime, fakecharities and quangos. Marvellous...

And what sort of vital jobs will they be taking on, in order to help this country get back on its feet?

You'll never guess...
Employment and training opportunities will be in a wide range of roles including administration officers, insulation fitters and assistant home energy advisors.
Just fantastic...
Mayor of Lewisham Sir Steve Bullock, said: “This is fantastic news for the borough and it’s residents.

“In these difficult economic times, it’s important as a Council we do all we can to support the community and we are working closely with our partners in the community and voluntary sectors to do just that.”
Bullock, if you really believe this is 'fantastic news for the borough and its residents' it's long past time you were packed off to the abattoir...

10 comments:

Brian, follower of Deornoth said...

Are there 150 lamp-posts in Lewisham?

Witterings from Witney said...

Ergo, the public are paying for yet more 'crats to tell them how to live their lives - for economic and social reasons it exmplifies why socialism will never work as people wish to spend their own money how they want and also wish to be 'better', and have more than their neighbour. That is human nature!

Simon Fawthrop said...

assistant home energy advisors.

They need assistants? WTF is so difficult about that non-job that they need someone to hold their hands FFS?

Brian, if there isn't I know a firm that sells and erects them. I'm sure we can find the money from somewhere.

James Higham said...

assistant home energy advisors

Oh goody - I want one of those, a sinecure for life or until the next eection.

Gibby Haynes said...

So what does an 'assistant energy advisor' do anyways? Stand and nod appreciatively as the energy advisor extols the virtues of natural gas boilers and how you really ought to replace you old pigeon-shit powered triple expansion engine with it?
Fuck this stupid, ridiculous country.

Quiet_Man said...

Non jobs, only Labour could come up with something as ridiculous and costly.

Labour, picking your pockets since 1997.

Brian, follower of Deornoth said...

Is an assistant energy adviser superior, or inferior to, a deputy energy advisor. How about assistant deputy energy advisors and deputy assistant energy advisors?

Public sector reform: machine-gun or flame-thrower?

JuliaM said...

"Are there 150 lamp-posts in Lewisham?"

Yes. But only 23 work. The council doesn't have any money to fix the rest...

"So what does an 'assistant energy advisor' do anyways? "

Holds the energy advisor's coat and fetches him tea?

"Public sector reform: machine-gun or flame-thrower?"

Biological warfare - we want to keep the infrastructure intact.

moriarty said...

And there was I thinking that the government had lost the plot when they used to praise call centres as the economic salvation of the future.

Mark said...

2 of the 3 Parliamentary seats that comprise the borough are highly marginal- when we have Tory governments, Lewisham East & Lewisham West tend to have Tory MPs, and vice versa (as is the case at present).

150 jobs is quite something (when you add spouses & grown up children) and could significantly increase the 'payroll vote'.

As Quiet Man says, this is NuLab picking your pockets- in this case, to help save a couple of London marginals.